The sharp sting of loss

It's been eight years
(On July 1st)
Since my first baby left me
At five short weeks and four shorter days
In a flood of blood and notmuch.
It's been eight years
But I can still remember the sight of it
And the strange calm as I flushed the toilet.

I hope I'm pregnant this month. Just to get me through. Because this is the first time in three years I've been this upset about it.

We all make choices in our lives. This was a choice I did not make.

Scrapbooking

I am not an arty person, I'm a wordy person. I can write REAMS for HOURS, but I couldn't draw a human form with any sense of proportion.

However, I can scrapbook. I started after our wedding, and I haven't looked back. I love doing it, love the impression you get from flicking through a handcrafted photo album, with all the little momentos and precious memories.

I love it. It is my life.

2ww

How I hate thee, with thy false promises...
I think I ovulated around a week ago. I don't feel pregnant, but my BOOBIES HURT. I might not have ovulated til Monday though, so I don't know.
I have a feeling this is not our month though.

CD8

This period is neverending. Last cycle it was nine days, this cycle is looking to beat that. I would totes go back on the pill were it not for the damnable trying to get pregnant thing.